Don’t let the pressure of writing your wedding vows get to you. Speak from your heart in a way that will be best received by your partner.

You can think of your vows as the first gift that you give your partner in your marriage. Now, this doesn’t mean there’s any pressure to make your vows the perfect speech, but instead to think through the process of beginning to write them.

Let’s start with the basics. According to, there are 5 things that you always want to make sure to include in your vows. You can fill in the rest of the blanks and go from there.

These 5 things are:

1. Saying “I love you”
2. Letting your partner know that you’ll be there for them no matter what
3. Sharing a personal anecdote about the two of you
4. Making promises to each other
5. Acknowledging that you’ll need outside support

This is a simple framework to cover the bases of being loving, sincere and making lifelong promises that you intend to keep.

But of course, you can always add inside jokes, the backstory of how you met, things you particularly love and cherish about your partner and anything else that is important to your relationship and you feel should be mentioned.

It’s a good idea to make sure that you and your partner are on the same page with how you plan to deliver your vows– whether it be heartfelt and sweet or silly and humorous, without giving too much away, of course.

If you and your partner share a sense of humor and that’s what you’d particularly like to share during your vows, focus on both making your vows humorous. If you want to focus this time of your wedding towards exchanging deep, loving words to each other; focus on that.

If you don’t particularly want to exchange heartfelt vows in front of your entire guest list, many couples also exchange vows before or after the ceremony in an intimate moment between the two of them. Sometimes, photographers document this moment to create some beautiful memories.

It’s recommended when writing your vows to not write more than one full page. If you stick to these parameters, you’ll focus on what’s really important to share during your speech and can take out any extra fluff.

If you don’t think that you can memorize your page of vows, don’t try to pressure yourself to do so. Use notecards! You can even write your vows on cards that match your beautiful wedding stationary and frame the notecards as a memento of your wedding day.

So, you’ve written your one page of vows, included the five suggested components and you’ve truly spoken from the heart. What now? Practice! Practice your vows to yourself in the mirror and potentially to your bridal party or closest loved ones. You’ll feel better if you have a general idea of how you’re going to deliver your vows, and you can collect some tips and insight from your loved ones if you’d like.

The most important thing to remember when writing your own vows is to make sure that you truly share with the love of your life how it makes you feel that you get to marry them. The moment is fleeting, so try to relax and treasure it with your future spouse!

©CTW Features